THE SNOT ROCKET

Recently, travelling from Amsterdam to Oslo I picked up a book in a small bookstore at the airport. The book was called "Why don't penguins feet freeze?", a book full of silly questions and answers, and far more boring than it sounds! However boring, there was ONE question or maybe more the answer to it that made me laugh out loud on the plain! I tink the only reason for the outburst was the fact that I frequent the"speed skating scene" a lot....and i think some of you skaters and spectators might find this amusing as well. :)

Q: -Is it a coincidence that a human finger fits exactly into a human nostril?
If not, why does my mother tell me NOT to do it?
-Jack (aged 9) London-

A: - Your mother may not approve of this either, but there is a way to clear your nose without sticking anything inside it. It's called "THE SNOT ROCKET". Just push against the side of one nostril to close it off, take a deep breath, close your mouth and exhale as hard and sharply as you can through the other nostril. You'll be amazed how fast the contents shoot out! Just make sure you tilt your head away from your body to avoid peppering yourself! Noseclearing tactics like the snot -rocket means there is no life-or-death reason for the co-evolution
of digging digits and large, inviting nostrils. In fact, a blocked nose is really only a problem if something gets loged near your nasal bones where it is dangerously close to your brain. That is a region where human fingers are too podgy to be of any use. So, we must conclude that,..yes, it is a mere coincidece that your fingers fits so nicely into your nostrils, and i doubt the the made-for-eachother argument will change your mothers opinion of Rhinotillexomania. i suggest you demonstrate the Snot-rocket instead and see what she says about that!!!

-Holly Dunsworth- State College, Pennsylvania US

And here comes the warnings!!!!

* While I agree that an expertly executed unilateral Snot-rocket is indeed a thing of beauty and
wonder I would caution against Holly Dunsworth's suggestion that you "exhale as hard and sharply
as you can from one snostril". My developing expertise inthis tecnique as a schoolboy was brought
to an abrubt halt by A BURST SINUS AND SEVER NOSEBLEED.
-Professor Duncan Hannant-

* I would also like to add a word of warning that this method is NOT particulary hygienic, and could spread any number of deseases. Snot-rockets should only be practised when you are by yourself.

Now, I could

"highlight" this note with a picture or two of some fantastic Snot-rockets taken at a number of ice rinks around the world, but I think some of you might find me hard to like if i do so I choose to illustrate this with a picture of a man who should be an example to a lot of us,....always bringing a pack of tissues. :)




Kirsti-